Thoughts From A Creature Of Habit

For a creature of habit, I sometimes feel I put my life through one too many upheavals and one too many Changes.

It’s always a tricky balance, to find the right balance between being contented and striving for what we think to be an ideal circumstance.

For example, how do we know if what we simply need a change of mindset to be happy at our job, or if what is really needed is a drastic change of environment?
How do we know when acceptance will lead to contentment, or when we really need to stand up against what we do not like to have around us?

Perhaps the best technique to employ in this tricky manoeuvre is to perform the actions without any attachments, regardless of the outcome. which is another tricky technique in itself, isn’t it.

For now, all I can tell myself is, enjoy the process. Be thankful for the choices and options we have.  Be grateful that we even have the opportunity to ponder and think about such philosophical aspects of life, because it means we have our basic needs met very well. Be happy.

PerthSydney on Film

Taken with Lomo LCA+, Kodak 200 film.

I’ve been reading about taking positive moments and savouring them, to wire our brains to be able to fall back on positive feelings whenever we need them. And I’ve realised that looking back at photographs are a great way to do that. Splitting my trip posts into many mini posts have also allowed me to savour each portion of the trip again, before placing them all back together in the mind as a “Happy Period”. Very easy to go back to whenever I need a reminder of positive, peaceful and restful periods…

The Teacher Called Waiting

Not too long ago, I went through this Waiting phase.

I felt stretched. My heart wouldn’t calm. It took my twice the amount of time to fall asleep. I felt like I was checking my email every hour. Waiting for confirmation, waiting for progress, waiting for change.

Although it seemed that I was being carried away on waves of events and happenings, throughout it all, I was also aware of the physiological changes and experiences of my mind and body. These experiences taught me things.

Waiting, taught me things.

Waiting taught me that I am not in control. At all. As much as we’d like to think we are, or have, control over the happenings in our lives, the fact is we do not. Or very minimal. Just breathe and let go. That’ll save everyone a lot of heart ache and trouble.

Waiting gave me time and opportunity to live my questions. It was very patient, allowing me to take as long as I need to realise that you can’t force things to happen by hoping for them to the point of desperation. You simply have to live them. The vivid colours of varied questions, the loveliness of uncertainty, the beautiful darkness of paranoia. You just have to live them all, until the answers come. Or perhaps the answers are in the living of the questions themselves.

Waiting did not impose views and perceptions, but allowed me to come to my own conclusions, resolutions, to discover my inner resources, to know myself better, to make me more aware of what inner resources I already have and what more I need to grow.

Through waiting, I learnt – though whether the lessons stuck I can’t say. They are currently insights and thoughts floating in my mind, hopefully being consolidated into strong neural networks which will work to my benefit the next time I need to call on these inner resources and insights.

Thank you, Waiting, for the lessons.

Till next time.

 

Everything in its Time

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